2 images, Azure and samisen during packing, so many hidden instruments, count them all. but then a fan which (all but) disappears as all fans do, into the background (and the real, taking slightly more time). what more can I say but Queneau, stylistic exercises. in my life, I prepare for a continuous leavetaking - I realized I haven't had even the semblance of a 'steady job,' that is a situation that seemed as if it might continue, since 1985, which means 23 years of scurrying. so I will die most likely rather soon - I feel the increased stress constantly - for which purpose I suggest you download as much as possible, as quickly as possible, whatever you might like, just on the offchance that the site goes fallow, that I'm unable to keep up payments for pecuniary or health reasons. in the meantime do check out the current, December, issue of Signal to Noise, p. 44 for an excellent article on my work - I do say so myself - every so often someone seems to have gotten it 'right,' by which I mean of course, something I agree with, no more and no less. Also if you have the chance, check out, in whatever stage of progress, Barbara Caspar's film Acker, on Kathy Acker - again, a getting-it-right; I saw this at MOMA here in NY and was tremendously moved. (Most work I've seen on Kathy makes claims one way or another, 'claiming Kathy' - this film, as much as possible (disclaimer here), give her the presence of the fullness of her speech, not that of others.)

a

fetal and fetal-field, more importations of human plasmatic neoplasm organism into programs of restructuration, retaining and amplifying abject deconstruction.

experiments with human modeling through a variety of programs passing matrices, objects, structures, vectors, from one to another, programs include Second Life, mocap, Blender, CS, Poser, scanning softwares, etc.

chirality, in this space

for 64 move upward 66
for 63 move rightward 63
for 62 move forward 62
for 61 move downward 61
for 60 move leftward 60
for 59 move backward 59
for 58 move upward 58
for 57 move rightward 57
for 56 move forward 56
for 55 move downward 55
for 54 move leftward 54
for 53 move backward 53
for 52 move upward 52
for 51 move rightward 51
for 50 move forward 50
for 49 move downward 49
for 48 move leftward 48

Yamatantra debris / ex-caliber /

identify with Yamantaka Vajrabhairava an occurrence from 1st thru 2nd life then identify with nothing at all when the space abandons itself



second life third life

begin by setting out directions, these are the five healthy directions,
the middle direction is one of exhaustion and ecstasy, then in the
direction opposite the middle direction set out the last direction, which
is one of wounding and suffering. if the middle direction is reception,
the last direction is penetration, if the last direction is reception, the
middle direction is penetration. set the house in order from the middle
direction outward, these are the spokes which narrow to the point of
intersection between the middle direction and last direction. now forget
the four directions, concentrate on the spokes, the point, the middle and
the last direction. then concentrate on the spokes, forget the point, the
middle and the last direction, the spokes come close to the point, forever
close to the point, but the point is absent, emptiness, emptiness radiates
outward between the spokes. now forget the spokes, emptiness radiates
among the ghosts of them, the spokes are hungry ghosts, they gnaw at
emptiness, they are wounded, they are defeated, they disappear. now think
of emptiness, think of nothing else, think of nothing. now you have laid
out the house and the world and the word, but you are in ignorance, you do
not know house or world or word, if you think house or world or word you
must begin again, laying out the five directions and so forth. now you
have come to an end and you are ready to begin, you have come to the
beginning, and you are ready to end. now continue.

you must imagine now yourself and house and world and word annihilated,
you must imagine annihilation of annihilation. you must imagine almost all
pleasure, among taste of delight and touch of exaltation, and among scent
of numinous being and sight of untold beauty and hearing of harmonious
sounds. now you must imagine another being joined to yourself and house
and world and word, you must imagine penetration reception and reception
penetration, you must imagine fullness and overflowing of delight. now you
will find you are creating and you are making sheave-woman and sheave-man,
you are sheave-woman and sheave-man, you have sheave-sight-and-sound, you
have sheave-touch-and-scent, you have sheave-taste-and-mind, you have
sheave-passion and sheave-ecstasy. now you will walk and remember, you
will remember everything, and you will speak and hear, see and taste, you
will forbid nothing, you will not be forbidden, you will rise above and
sink below, you will be among the direction of wounded and suffering. now
you will do this for a long time, for aeons.

now you will embrace emptiness, you are making sheave-other, you are
making sheave-emptiness, you are making wrath, are making creation, are
making annihilation. now you are making annihilation, now you are among
them, beneath them, above them, now you are beyond them. now you are no
longer imagining, you are no longer thinking among them, you are no longer
thinking, no longer sheave, no longer thought, now you are annihilation,
now you are making nothing, now you are annihilation, now you destroy
house and world and word, now you are destroyed, now you are annihilation,
you are free, you are emptiness, you are annihilation, you are emptiness,
now you are free.



Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Say everything.
Julu: Say nothing.
Julu: Say Nikuko.
Nikuko: Say Everything.
Julu: Say Julu.
Julu: Say nothing.
Nikuko: Julu.



almost a sonnet -

Azure wakes up in the middle of the night, she says
she says, well I say, I'm getting up here in Denver,
there might be coyotes - I say, are you awake, feeling
a bit moronic with the possibility of an 'of course' -
she replies you have to get out of the way - I say, of
what - of the man with the cart - what man - the man
with the cart - I look, we're in a small room, surely,
if there were a man with a cart, I'd see him - well he
was behind the cart - but still - I look around, she's
awake now - I say where did he come from - she says
she says, from the closet - she says from the closet -
I can't sleep, it's 3am or 4am - I say, I'm getting up,
I rise like the dark sun of her dreams - she's sleeping
again, I dress in the dark, look out the window - no
coyotes to be seen, no man, no cart, no me, I walk down
the hall, open the laptop, write this, almost a sonnet -

PLEASE NOTE:

My webpage is no longer http://www.asondheim.org but
http://www.alansondheim.org
Thank you.

savaged code

ps ml r yr ml an yt ml j hz ml uh ml aml ml af c ml ag uh an ah af an ah
ah c ah am j ah ap aag b ag ag baaiah bb ap ah bb b aibb bb am bb ch ap bb
d aw bb dd babb ds cc bb ecubb edd cc eeech eef cueg dd e gg ds egz eeeh g
eehb gz eehb hb f hb huff hb igg hb jj h hb jk hh hb jl ihb jl jj hh jl jl
hujl jn ijl jp iijl jq jk jl jr jm jl js jo jl js jq jm jt js jn jt jujojt
jw jq js jx jr js jy jt js k jv jt kajx jt kakajukakb jv kakd jx kakf k
kakg kb kakh kd kakh kf kb kh kh kc kikj kd kh kl kekh km kg kh kn kikh
kokk kikp km kikp kokj kp kq kk kp ks kl kp kt kn kp kukp kp kv kr kp kw
kt kp kw kv kq kw kx kr kw kz kt kw lakukw lb kw kw lc ky kw lc lakx ld lc
ky ld lekz ld lf l ld lh lb lc lild lc lj lf ld lk lh ld lk lj lelk ll lf
lk ln lg lk lolilk lp lk lk lq lm lk lr lolk lr lq ll lr ls lm lr lulolr
lw lp lr lx lr lr ly lt lr ly lv ls lz lx lt lz lz lulz malv lz mc lx lz
md ly lz mem lz mf mc lz mf mem mf mg mamf mimb mf mj md mf mk mf mf mm mh
mf mn mj mg mo mm mg momomh momq mj momr mk mn mt mn mn mump momumr momv
mt mp mv mv mq mv mx mr mv mz ms mv n mumv namw mv nb my mv nb n mw nb nc
mx nb nd my nb nf n nb ng nb nb nh nd nb ninf nc nj nh nc nj nj nd nj nl
nenj nm ng nj noninj np nk nj nq nm nj nq nonk nq nq nl nq ns nm nq nunn
nq nv np nq nw nr nq nx nt nq nx nv nr ny nx ns ny nz nt ny oanv nx ob nw
nx oc ny nx od ony oeoc ny oeoenz oeog ooeoh ob oeoj od oeok of oe ol oh
oeol oj of ol ol og ol on oh ol op oiol oq ok ol or om ol os oool ot oq om
ot os on ot ouooot ow op ot ox or ot oy ot ot oz ov ot p ox ot p oz oup
paov p pc ox p peoy p pf p p pg pb p pg pepaq pg pb q rh pc q s pd pg sk
pf pg sl q pg sp s q t sk q t sp rh t tt s t uusc t xl sl t yl t t z ut zz
xl t zz z tt zz pk uzz em xl zz y yl zz ----------- zz zz
--------------------------------------------------------------------- se
zz ---------------------------------------------------------------------
pt pk ad ----------- sead ad em ad bk pt ad di----------- ad fr
--------------------------------------------------------------------- ad
ac bk ad gc diad gc ac -jugc fabk gc ea/ gc tr fr gc ab gc gc us begc detr
fadeus fahehebeheretr dehw ab dest dedetibl detihw he bh st bl bh bh rebh
pr hw bh ak in bh sh tibh at um bh ar ribh ar at um ar av pr ar al riar wt
sh ar ex ar ar pl al ar es wt av cr pl av cr cr al cr et sw cr biex cr
jees cr ul ed cr tp bicr tp jeed tp tp et tp tubi tp gr witp sn ul tp _
qutp roaotp rosn qurc roturc dw aorovasn roge_ roterc rososarc im terc im
im dw im db saim as geim ur so im wh woim tm as im tm ur wotm tm db tm en
as tm iv citm ep wh tm it tx tm weeg tm weep tx auween aucp eg auis iv
audr it weay auauby ce auwr dr auwr by cp wr cy cewr cl dr wr br by wr
buwr wr sb cl wr sb br cy un sb taun cacl un iovisb ic busb ss un sb ph
ioun er ic un er ph caer ck ioer godaer hoss er ct er er iasuer vehoer
veiack veha suvefuhovers ct ve_of veve_th cove_th rn hae_re_th coe_re -..>
fue_rex rn e_refe_of _th ir e_re_th dy x e_redm fee_redm dy -..> dm il x
dm gh dodm el ir dm ek dm dm fieidm dp el dm dp fiil rt rt eirt gl el dp
ry ek dp ev dp dp yoth dp yoeort ug ev th ug ug gl ug dueoug ez ry ug wn
youg ty poug fohv ug foty poform dufofs hv fo rg wn fod- fofogivl foft rg
rm ws girm ws ws vl ws gafs ws aad- ft tn ft ft gb jiws - aaws - tn ji- -
ga- id aa- gj tf - sigb - gn tv - if cs - if sitv ieif id iegucs if hisiif
rr gn if ec ieif cg hiie i-biec iei-bii-bigui-bism up i-bivorr i-birl cg
i-biig n/ i-bi ht voi-biht rl n/ ht ht sm ht hy voht rufl ht rd ig ht tw
fm ht zora ht zord fm hn zohy hn -s rahn ut rd zoyw tw zoi/ hn zoputohn
boyw hn bobo-s bozitobov yw bogy pubopizibozev bozegy zizeze gf dc eb v
zepp ew zewapizeax dc zepw tb dc _pr wadc _pr pw eb _pr e/ tb _pr hp pp
_pr rp ax _pr vu_pr _pr fc ys _pr hq rp _pr hq fc e/ hq uays hq rv rp hq
dl vuhq yehq hq sy az hq sy dl uatc sy az tc eh rv tc _vt yatc i_cn yesy
f/ tc sy i_in _vt tc i_loi_cn tc i_loi_in eh i_lo g/ _vt i_lot/
i_bii_loi_tx f/ i_lots i_loi_louii_pv i_lotl i_tx i_lotl uig/ tl aq i_pv
tl uc i_tx tl uets tl sf tl tl ux eq tl ux ud aq uy sf eq uy uy uc uy ef
ud uy wl sf uy ip ux uy xv vv uy ps wl uy ps xv vv ps yr ef ps hz w ps ip
ps ps ps yt ps yr yr yt



Memory of a Walk


I walked last Wednesday night from the Modern Culture and Media building
at Brown University to the train station downtown. I took the 6:16 to New
York. It arrived around 9:50 at Penn Station. On the way I remembered the
walk. I followed myself step by step, reconstructing as I went along. This
was six days ago. Now again I remember.

What did you think you were doing?

Memory and reconstruction worries me. I wanted to follow myself. I didn't
think of this at the time, that is the time of the walk itself, but only
later. I conductor asked if I were a philosopher; I think I appeared deep
in thought. I wanted to remember as much as possible. Later, several times
in the past six days, I thought I would try and remember again, try to
write everything down. But I thought this would take too much effort; it
wasn't until now, Tuesday, that I've had the energy to proceed.

What did you take with you?

I'm clearing my belongings out of Leslie Thornton's office. This trip I
took, in addition to what I brought up, a Cambodian bowed instrument, a
pair of slippers, some extra toiletries, a white towel. The towel and a
plastic bag were wrapped around the instrument and inserted into a cloth
bag. It was damp out. I added a polka-dotted umbrella as well, in case I
needed it.

Where did you go?

I went down the stairs and out the front door. Susan and Ellen were in the
office talking. I didn't say anything to them. I walked out the door and
turned right.

What did you do then?

I walked to the corner. I thought about going straight down as usual, but
instead crossed the street. I began walking up a slight hill to the Brown
Quadrangle. I passed two people as I turned into the Quadrangle. I took a
diagonal left, which would leave me out between two libraries.

Wait, I remember crossing the first intersection. I think there was little
or no traffic.

Then?

Then I walked diagonally through the cold mist, almost but not quite a
rain. I went through the gates to the top of the street. I didn't notice
the sculpture on the left; usually I look at it. I crossed the street. I
was surprised there was no traffic. I thought that usually there was
traffic. I began the descent of the hill. I passed the location of the old
Brown Music Department, where I had played several times; I thought about
that. I didn't think about the arts building that replaced it. I went
straight down the hill. I arrived at Benefit Street.

At Benefit Street you had several choices. What did you decide here?

I crossed Benefit street; I believe there was some traffic, but I'm not
sure. I continued going down the hill. I passed a corner building and
looked in a window. I wondered whether the window was where my studio at
Rhode Island School of Design used to be. I thought again about the
accusation I had stolen equipment and wondered how S. could possibly think
that since I had no place to take it but the school itself. I looked in
other windows on the way down; they were studios. I think they might have
been drawing studios; I'm not sure. I reached the bottom of the hill.

Now you're into the city itself, or at least the outskirts of the city, by
Providence River. What did you do?

I crossed the intersection here. This one I remember being easy. I arrived
at the bank of the river, the bank nearest the hill. I thought that the
time before I had crossed and taken the other bank. I found that the river
split, and that I was thrown off-course, that I ended up guiding myself by
the Statehouse dome. This time I felt tired, and stayed on the nearer
bank. I looked into the water as I walked towards the train station; I
couldn't see anything. I reached the next corner.

Then there was traffic?

There was a lot of traffic. I ran across the street; I was almost hit. I
continued on the other side.

Did you press the button for the traffic signal?

I remember a button, but it might have been farther on. I didn't press it,
I think. Perhaps I did.

And then?

Then I continued walking. I think it was either this block or the next,
possibly the end of this block, still by the river, that I heard foot-
steps. Or possibly saw someone ahead of me. But I think it began with the
footsteps. At the next intersection.

We're then at another heavily trafficked one?

Yes, the footsteps belonged to a woman, I think possibly a student, carry-
ing a backpack or small suitcase of some sort. I didn't see her full-on; I
couldn't identify her, but thought she might be blond.

What happened?

She had crossed the street and I crossed as well, somewhat behind her.
This was the second time I was almost hit; I wanted to make the light,
since the signals were long.

And then?

The road curved up ahead. Wait, there was a four-way stop intersection.
She continued up the curve on the left. I walked part of the way across
the bridge, crossing the Providence River. I stopped and looked down in
the water. I was looking for the herring or shad family fish I had seen
there before, in large schools. It was dark out; I looked for ripples in
the water. The week before I was guided by ripples. This time there were
none. I couldn't remember the name of the fish, something like mulhagen; I
still can't remember. I was frustrated, worried that I couldn't remember.

After looking in the water for a while?

I crossed the street. There was hardly any traffic. I looked up ahead to
see if the student was heading to the train station. I thought I saw her;
I couldn't be sure. I stopped on the other side of the street, which was
the other side of the bridge. I looked again down at the black water; I
was looking for the fish on the other side. Most of the time I had seen
them on this, the other side. This time again there was nothing, no
ripples, at least none visible. But wait.

Wait?

On the first, left-hand side of the bridge, I saw a leaf in the water; it
was large, and looked like one of the fish on its side; I wondered if it
was in fact one that was dying. When I looked on the other, right-hand
side of the bridge, I saw several more, and it was clear that they were
leaves, slowly going down the river.

Which way were they going?

I'm not sure; the river flowed slowly, but I believe from the right-hand
side to the left-hand side and beyond.

And then?

Then I began walking up the hill towards the train station. I had again to
go out into the street because the sidewalk was partly closed due to
construction. I walked past a number of parked cars on the right, in this
fashion. I noticed the construction was coming along, and remembered
hearing that apartments were to be built here. As I walked up the hill I
walked over a recently-asphalted entrance to the construction site, or
near the entrance. I wondered why the asphalt had been poured; it could
only be temporary and didn't seem to serve any purpose. I continued up the
sidewalk.

Did you see any birds?

No, often in the daytime, particularly in the spring, I had seen birds
around the site and in the trees directly to the left of the train
station. But this time there was nothing. I looked down into the huge
excavation beyond the immediate construction and noticed for the second
time, the train platform, I think it was the platform for the number 1 and
2 tracks, jutting out into it. The platform looked oddly spacious and
beautiful in the dark. I continued walking past the trees.

This was near the taxicab stand?

This went directly past the taxi stand. I saw a number of drivers standing
around; they were speaking a language I didn't understand. At first I
thought, this might be Pakistani, but then I thought Italian; I couldn't
hear well enough. The drivers all seemed to know one another. I wondered
what would happen if a new driver came along, who didn't speak the
language - would he or she be accepted in the group? Would the group, on
occasion, speak English to him or her? Would the driver be ignored? This
went on only for an instant. I reached the station doors and went in.

Just went in?

I remember looking at my cellphone on the way, at least twice, checking on
the time. I was early as usual; I think I arrived at 5:34, for the 6:16,
but I'm not sure. I was hungry.

How long did the walk take?

I think it took about twenty-one minutes, but I couldn't be sure. If I had
gone directly, it would have taken between seventeen and eighteen.

You were hungry? Were you hungry the whole time?

I was hungry the whole time; I had only breakfast at Louie's, a #1 with
orange juice extra, I think, beforehand. I was going to drink some Red
Bull to keep me going through the day, but had a large coffee with skim
milk instead; the Red Bull is still in the office.

So what did you do?

I went to the small cafe inside the train station. The man who served me
wasn't there; the woman was. I had often wondered about their relation-
ship; they seemed tight. I ordered, I think, something with apricot; I'm
not sure. I do remember eating it without getting sticky; I didn't have to
wash my hands afterwards.

And this whole time you were carrying both your camera bag with various
things you had brought with you, as well as the cloth bag contraption with
the Cambodian instrument and other things?

Yes. I believe I also took back a copy of The Structure of Reality with me
on this trip. I had a copy of Claire's demo DVD, since I'm writing a
recommendation for her. I remember I didn't change clothes; the clean ones
were still in the bag. I had some trail mix left over from the ride up. I
didn't want to order anything on the train.

And you were reading?

Yes, I had books with me, but I'm not sure I remember them. I definitely
had Jane Austen's Northanger Abbey, which I had read; now I wanted to
finish Sanditon which was in the same Penguin volume, which of course I
did. And I had a copy of David Hume's Enquiry with me as well; I had been
reading about miracles. But I think there might have been a third book.
The week before I had carried a relatively medieval history of the tantric
schools of Tibet, but I don't think I had it with me this time.

What else were you carrying?

Other than the usual identifications, I had a small Olympus solid-state
recorder for notes. I didn't use it - I had been hoping to. The camera bag
was somewhat heavy of course. Another item - a small power supply for the
phone.

Do you remember going down the stairs from the office?

Not very well. I do remember having to negotiate the stairs because of the
awkwardness of the instrument package. Once outside, things were easy. I
had been afraid of rain; the skies were threatening all day. But as I
said, there was none, or rather just a light misting, slightly, nothing
more.

Money?

I had taken sixty dollars with me, but had spent very little. I spent
nothing on the train on the way up, so I had all of that. I spent little
there, and little on the train. I had walked down to Wickenden or
Wickendon street to go to an antique shop; I was hoping to find some
useful books, but nothing seemed promising. So I had most of the money
with me of course. I also had four rolls of unused Tri-X and Plus-X (the
new Plus-X) 16mm movie film to shoot in the winter and spring. And on the
way up I had brought a mini-DV tape for transferring the second roll I had
shot, but the roll wasn't back and the tape stayed in the office.

Anything else?

Some recommendation forms from Claire; I had to fill these out. I was
afraid they would get bent. I put them between the pages of something else
I was carrying back - I don't remember, a pamphlet of some sort.

Were you tired when you walked down to the train station?

I was extremely tired; I had hardly slept the night before - I coughed a
lot, there were sounds around, etc. I should add I sleep in the office to
save money; there's a futon. So I was glad that the air was bracing. I
went down to the train platform itself - #1 as usual - at 6:04 - I
remember looking at the clock - because it was open to the air and would
wake me up. I walked down; I haven't taken the elevator for a long time. I
noticed that the construction inside the station was down for the first
time - there were new escalators installed, but the one for track #1 only
went up.

Anything else?

Only that I remembered, as I approached the station, that I would be too
tired, and it would be too late, to go to the Border's bookshop in the
nearby mall. When I went into the station, I wouldn't come out again, at
least until the train I boarded left, which it did, two minutes late.




ballet's wet Pirouette grande (dance-film)


Arabesque foot
penchee down
up goes
goes the
the head
foot what
down a
head penchee
what up
a goes
balance,
the
straight the
line floor,
slammed what
to a
floor, hinge
wanton straight
hinge line
allongee
to
high, higher,
higher, pole-hole
pole-hole spectacular,
spectacular, nothing
nothing hidden,
hidden, wanton
thrown
foot
thing, thrown,
Throw, spun
thrown, around,
spun secret
around, archaic
secret vision,
archaic bared
vision, returned
bared thing,
returned
Throw,
Sur up,
les higher,
pointes useless
lift running,
it get
up, away,
useless hinge
running, Sur
get les
away, pointes
every
lift
bone sorry
hurts monsieur
i Grand
am plie
so partners
sorry ready
monsieur for
Grand your
plie bone
partners hurts
ready i
for am
your
so
pleasure, fingertips,
fingertips, fear
never Lift,
fear caressed
Lift, partner
caressed lifting
partner sex
lifting pleasure,
sex
wanton
armed smells,
one wanton,
or she
another, looks
looks, the
smells, hard
wanton, thing
she over
looks armed
hard or
thing another,
over
looks,
distance, damp,
body slid,
hinged, flesh
damp, fingered,
slid, wanton,
flesh well
fingered, or
well distance,
tunnel,
hinged,
nub your
mausoleum hands
seconde, knees,
on look
hands blessed
and of
knees, nub
look mausoleum
blessed seconde,
of
on
world you
have Blessure
you extension
Blessure tripped
extension privilege
tripped Attitude
privilege grecque,
Attitude the
grecque,
world
void to
abyss, be
spartan, sure,
here would
be brought
sure, the
they void
would abyss,
brought nothing
house don't
battement, with
don't that
catch leg
anything of
with yours,
that house
leg down
yours,
battement,
scented, En
drift and
En where
travesti, one
where scented,
discovers
the
holes
hinged
poles
soles holes
roles.
hinged




The Muralist


The muralist has one good idea, something he repeats over and over again.
The muralist is an expert portraitist, avatartist.
It has been said (of him), He paints the same woman again and again.
It has been said, It is the result of an unhappy love affair.
Of the muralist: His pallet is limited, his technique sure.
Of the name of the woman: Jennifer.
Of her surname: Unknown.
The one good idea of the muralist is transcendent.
It is said (of him), Everything is contained in these portraits.
It is said, As with Being, so with the Portrait of the muralist.
The muralist paints the eyes mysteriously, they follow you.
The muralist uses techniques found in primordial drawings and caves.
No one possesses the woman of the Portrait.
It is said, the woman of the Portrait is Woman, is infinite.
(It is suggested she is a woman of the sheaves.)
(It is suggested she contains others, who contain her.)
The muralist is considered mad, obsessed, compulsive.
It has been said (of him) that his skill comes from bewitchment.
It has been said that Jennifer paints the Portrait over and over again.
Of the muralist: That he is a woman, that he is Jennifer.
Of the muralist: That he has no skill, that he is doomed to repetition.
It has been said: Jennifer is the result of an unhappy love affair.
(It is suggested she is his daughter.)
(It is suggested she is a daughter who died at birth.)
(It is suggested she is the mother of a daughter who died.)
Of the muralist: That he understands women, he understands Jennifer.
Of the Portrait: That Jennifer speaks, that Jennifer speaks through him.
The muralist repeats herself (it is whispered).
She has had one good idea (it is whispered and whispered).
That she paints and paints (the result of an unhappy love affair).
(It is whispered. It is murmured. It is said.)

http://www.alansondheim.org/Portrait.mov

images by azure carter (most likely)

my ghost in my machine


mv clara
postulations; these ian;
; then there are relays, one to another, all indirect -

hole. i put my face in my hole._" (, hole, in uncontrollable bod-
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Plot: clearly jennifer, dreaming and loving .
scott screambaby: screen-l : stephan stephan steven telektronikk
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sions-oo--oo-sourcess-oo-spam-oo-
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holes are visible, open: she is speaking: "i am 's beautiful
friend, hello , you are my new friend, hello squid, you are my new
slot, it enters your inbox, you see there, you see there,
write by the rules, 's obnoxious, his thought's idiotic, he plays
anything with it, 's far too bitter, his name is so ugly, he's far
your holes, it's far too creepy, you see there, you see
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surely you must think, mr. , that you are stale and have covered
is it something else, mr. . [shrug] [jump]
you are a saint, mr. . [laugh] [kiss]
mr. , we are with you in our heart. you are a genius and you must
of course you will not, mr. , you have never done but brilliant
audience [empathetic] [poor mr. ]
you are so brave mr. , i cannot believe how brave you are in this
that was wonderfully put, mr. , thank you, thank you, thank you.
noticed the gears beginning to saw away at the studs and ties.
skeining skeins Snoxfly sourcess spam stentor stromatolite
( soaking, filmed with the dying camera
( in mourning and recuperation
inscribes itself on retinal matrices. it says ', there is nothing
to look at.' it says, ', you will have nothing to see.' i hide
inscribed with rectilinear coordinates. sawgrass says, ', this is
embarrassment. my machines say ' is not a pariah.' i am run by my
' is not a pariah.' i am run by my machines in this direction. it
', there is nothing to look at.' it says, ', you will have
says, ', this is your imaginary.' sawgrass says, 'inscribe
Login name: In real life:
-dark - assassin-killer laureate. -genius I am
sick of assassin-killer -dark - assassin-killer. laureate
-genius doesn't know how stupid and rude he is. laureate
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- is hated more than beautiful-laureate of sir hates
laureate -genius or his stupid old-man writing. beautiful-laureate
of sir thinks he is better than assassin-killer. -dark -
suffering in the world. How pathetic is laureate -genius saying
how pathetic assassin-killer is. Read laureate -genius for the
second time and he is a trite baby wa-wa. -dark - thinks
he can get away with laureate. -genius assassin-killer thinks he
about -dark. - assassin-killer ruins creativity for
others. Everyone has discovered coding before laureate -genius
bad idea and sends it everywhere in the world. laureate -genius
writes about nothing else other than death.
writes about nothing else other than doaned viewers aware
all of 's writing is about his death; he goes on and on about
patent blanket
- the effect is a slow movement of air throughout. the patent
elements. the patent blanket is under development.
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and ellen zweig
pull. except pluspart, azure carter, . no production, no direction
but read the stele of AB.BA.HI.A.
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's Home bathingbeauties.mov
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two important short films by
i tell you, if it wasn't for , theory wouldn't exist!
Created by
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to look at.' it says, ', you will have nothing to see.' i hide
inscribed with rectilinear coordinates. sawgrass says, ', this is
embarrassment. my machines say ' is not a pariah.' i am run by my
' is not a pariah.' i am run by my machines in this direction. it
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says, ', this is your imaginary.' sawgrass says, 'inscribe
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form. Form, thrust out. Form, thrust away." (, Disorders of the

unspeakable reality of the world. In this uncanny present, 's
In 's writings digitization is no historical process. Or if we are
process, shows that we find rupture and breakdown of the process
digital. The great importance of 's writings is to treat the
More specifically, writes the problematic of the analog and the
digital. There is a rhythm to 's writings on the subject. Even
the more in its absence or gap. 's writing is syncopated in all
Firstly, these writings are syncopated in the way thinks through
only in digital form. There are only analog-simulacra. 's
through the analog. takes a different route, gambling on a
these will not reduce the confusion. This is not to say that
The ``mathematical physicist'' addresses in ``Spike'' could help
some level. More simply, writes from a belief in the world. The
Secondly, 's writing is syncopated in the way it differentiates
by explaining that ``by digital I mean discrete,'' ties thinking
both ``relative and fundamental,'' explains . For example,
``intervention'' in everyday life. is clear that raster and
Every aphorism is latent in every other and 's writing remembers
communication. 's aphoristic writing is in the mode of Novalis or
Finally, bodily interruption syncopates 's writing. Of course, it
digital and analog. This is 's concern throughout, but it is most
's aphorisms is reprocessed and hashed and the embodied text stops
making sense. offers some clues or lures for the reader. Perhaps
super-ego, suggests, followed by the introduction of numbers and
libidinal. To say that 's writing exhausts the problematic of the
through.'' 's work on the analog and digital works on itself. What
's writings on the analog and digital are grounded in pragmatics.
technologies. explains the digital as the result of setting up a
possibility of accumulation. Finally, 's raster and protocol are
None of this is entirely new in 's work. The concern with the
back as early theoretical writings, such as The Structure of
allowed a theory of online writing as hysterical text, as
environment. For , the implication was subjectivity in relation to
If writes against the digital future described by Kittler and
On the one hand, saw the possibility of a future where REWRITE
If 's analog and digital writings do not foreground futurity in
digital orders. What is such an intervention? does not specify
a world of increasing digitization, demonstrates the entanglement
immense importance. The style and content of the work is radical.
dialogue with . The content ranges from theory to praxis, with
and virtual subjectivity. While interacting with 's ebook of
and thought itself has written: "These are the essays I
"['s] writing exploits the plasticity of natural and machine
Introduction: Codework

Weisses usually in Massachusetts. In contrast, the side of the
deep; I had felt close to the Weiss, not the , side of the family.
lives in another world, just like our own.
saw the world was his.
would listen to you speaking and would
listen to listening to you speaking.
knew that the world was doubled.
would watch it burst, but it would burst
was not joined at the horizon.
and then the world. would hardly hear
For my mother, Evelyn Weiss
: This is fascinating - I'm always curious how many of
:
:
displayed the following
: Some of them are working! I've been playing around
: But Im not in bold now -are you? There's no bold at
: Well, I've got the URL up - yes, it's difficult, you
: Why don't you start with questions and we'll see where
: It's odd because those seem like different operations
: Well, what gets rid of the "I self Me" - which is
: The protocols reference code and the breakdown of
: and it's between code and its breakdown that I'm
: which is partly interpretable in a classical sense
: She disappeared a while ago; I didn't want to write
: The space-between code - what underlies writing here
: I started calling this 'codework' which has taken on a
: So the subtext so to speak ruptures the text which
: As if the bones of the tomb of writing were made
: - as if the bones had some sort of presence in the
: So that the writing in a way is 'lurid' - cutting
: As in the 'Anita Berber' pieces that I've put up at
: Mistakes in print, and in the traditional Tanach, five
: There's the "skeleton" of a piece of writing - which
: which gives you a huge list of synonyms. The first
: Which is a kind of overflowing of synonyms, burying
: and there's a parallel with Berber's life here, at
: This isn't my 'best' tabla work, but I thought it
: I wonder what happened; I'm always afraid of clicking
: The first bit - the short bit - is a
: There are better tabla pieces here! I think something
: Think of the rest as both an expansion and a
: in so many directions that nothing
: It a strange interface with a mysterious life of its
: two bits in that sentence will get you a quarter (bad
: yes, but you might want to ask away here? When I enter
displayed the following
: There are so many terms - I mentioned 'codework'
: which just about close everything down in a classical
: If you think of say Lautreamont - what he was doing
: But if had to attent a conference on his own work,
: What I've put up here - and you do have to shuttle
: There's also a few code snippets (most of which I've
: I tend to write in Unix or Linux - I've been doing
: which allows me to use all sorts of sophisticated text
: Just briefly - the first is Normal, then 'Back" takes
: Punched Cards is another linux program that turns
: Eliminate which was written by Florian Cramer for me
: Elimx is one I wrote from Florian's that makes a mess
: Cramer made a program that eliminates duplicate
: The program is above. It counts different words for
: The "mathesis" program I love - Jim Reith wrote it for
: You can enter a mathematical function (the very first
: GoogleScrape - is just using the Google program (API
: It's just a more sophisticated way of using google
: Then there's the "Simple perl program results" - which
: Yes of course, that would be a lot better than this
: Yes to both, that was also a while ago. Shinto
: Not so much; I've been very moved by Red Pine's
: because I can't get myself "around it" - which is
: On the other hand, I could never 'submit' to Zen or to
: and am alienated by, say, Mishima, by whale-hunting,
: The one book that stays with me, now, is the Flower
: These are openings for me, and the sutra is
: By the way (while waiting) the Yipes! text is made
: And the "Using Chat" was made by recording one of
: Ah I see - for me in relation to D Turner's second
: about Youtube and so forth - the work skitters among
: I also work with dancers in Geneva, Switzerland, and
: Yes, the meaning shifts in each context, but the
: Edting in relation to suprlus - that depends on what
: but I prefer also to work on an idea, get through with
: Code and text interact for me; sometimes the structure
: When I'm working with software (I work at the Virtual
: to some sort of limit - seeing what happens at the
: Text-based work allows me to think the
: I write a great deal of theory, and it's so easy to
: Sometimes it matters, most of the time it doesn't - if
: whether or not one understands it fully. There are
: I did some work in visual basic (you can download the
: Exactly like lace, and just as
: It makes it seem as if the world is both obdurate,
: I think of Jacques Lacan in this regard - reading his
: There are also political concerns here - trying to
: Which effects in the films? And you should sometime
: There are avatars that are constructed from motion
: and images from laser scanning equipment (big
: I'm not sure which this is! I think that's the
: The Wolf piece - that's using motion capture and
: Yes, Bellmer fascinates me, but thenI worry - in my
: It's separate, it's faster than Max I think - the
: A lot of teen-age boys make 'ideal' girlfriends with
: I think my work walks an edge of being lurid and
: I do think at least in the US these images are the
: There was a book years ago which talked about Jewish
: culture as breaking down the 'etiquette' of middle or
: for example Freud scraping at the psyche, Marx at
: And these people were - again perhaps like codework
: partially-assimilated Jews, but not 'really'
: This is obviously a gross over-simplification but it
: You have the same thing, say, in the blues, with
: When I'm surprised by the result, it's a success, no
: when I know 'what I'm doing' - it may well be a
: I coined the term 'defuge' to reference those moments
: for example when you try to read a novel several
: The same thing happens with pornography, but that's
: - if pornography were 'ideal' - one image would do it
: In sports it's another related issue - one wants one's
: So there's a kind of disinvestment at work here, and
: I think it depends. I haven't been thrown out of
: I also cross-post a lot which bothers
: The sexual content of some of the work bothers
: And at my end I have little patience for what I think
: I don't know, some tame, some not tame - it depends on
: "don't I think" - I'm not sure where this typo was
: With my work? Just to be able to keep doing it. And
: I'm terrible at programming, okay with borrowing or
: I want to explore more 'body-avatar' issues in Second
: for me, at least the aesthetics of
: Well, she may return, but there are other things -
: I don't thin I need an editor but I might have
: In fact some of the work they do is imitating avatars
: When you getto something like the Wolf,
: I have no dance background, but I work with a dancer
: That's his choreography from the avatar tapes
: We tend to inspire each other. I can't do much
: I agree re: Butoh, I haven't, but would like to work
: Or I'm the material for the dancers; it's really back
: At times I'm not sure who is doing what with whom or
: I can stay for a few more minutes if there are any
: Oh someone asked why the webpage is a
: That's the simplest way I can present the materials;
: The Trace materials are different - they were done
: There are six left; before I leave, are there any
: I'll sign out then and thank you and thank you
: No problem; I'm about to sign out unless there's a
: I'll be on the discussion board later this
: Kate, please send the recording if you
: Thank you as well - I'm constantly worrying about the
, Written on some Body
- (somewhere over Kentucky)
Pardon me for interrupting, but are you the on the Poetics
, lists, there is a certain consistency, there is a certain
ici, you are here, you are really here, trans. .
, beatle-eyed, there wasn't a bone to him that wasn't soft, if
I tell you, if it wasn't for , theory wouldn't exist! He sure
, I said, and he replied, oh, the musical?! No, I said, the phil-
It's the melatonin, I said, gave it to him, and it changed his
blue glow of dawn.' (James Lee Burke, Heaven's Prisoners)." (,
re Carter, - this flicking among flics among flicks - an _o
[ joined the session]
[ started recording]
: Listening to this session for the echo in the room.
: "Recording this session" "Listening to this session"
: I remember when I used to write into the void,
: And because the worlds were beyond worlds, because of this,
: They recorded only as echoes, they sounded only as echoes.
: That was the beginning of appearance, that was the ending
[ stopped recording]

by
, CO-MODERATOR OF INTERNET.

, TESTIFIER
this the - so when this happened and I interrupted, I'd find
, beatle-eyed, there wasn't a bone to him that wasn't soft, if
I tell you, if it wasn't for , theory wouldn't exist! He sure
, I said, and he replied, oh, the musical?! No, I said, the phil-
It's the melatonin, I said, gave it to him, and it changed his
, dark horse of sacrifice, given to the queen
Jen
out of defuge () - the _hacker drive_ which tends towards what
isolation, however tautology's shadow." (, Textbook of Thinking.)

theorized (Kaja Silverman, The Acoustic Mirror; , Fissure
Resent-From: ($?x$x <$g>$|$g$.) crackaddr( <>)
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personal-name = *** To : Travis***
Prisoners)." (, Love, The Blue Glow of Dawn)
"
" lives in another world, just like our own.
saw the world was his.
would listen to you speaking and would
listen to listening to you speaking.
knew that the world was doubled.
would watch it burst, but it would burst
was not joined at the horizon.
and then the world. would hardly hear
I glow for you, where I glow for you, my name , where it
The name is no longer the same, "" is virtual, faded; "," a
simulacrum structuration systemics Thomas-Edwards Thomas-Edwards.
tends towards a translation of , but with other, more reson-
, Brooklyn, New York, and the date.

this writer , a conveyance or purchaser of such a magazine at
But the model, this writing says, is Mina Tsurumaru perhaps
. I sense it's broken because I'm breaking back in America
For.Daishin.Nikuko.by..
A jumps up and down and nothing breaks.
A immediately regrets his life!
A Has Fled The MOO!
This is an automated reply. is in at the moment but
"You are an impatient man, Mr. ," Jennifer said, holding
"I'm an orphan," Mr. , she replied.
[Kim McGlynn and ]
( and Kim McGlynn)
"In the past five years, has produced a large body of work,
"A more appropriate place to begin is with 's notion of the 'rich-
"One of the basic strategies in all 's work is to extend an analy-
es, errors can be especially revealing and thus much of 's work,
"For our purposes, and apparently for 's as well, the working-out
"But before the formalism settled into a final form, began to
ness and Being._] "however, _A General Theory of Reality,_ which
"As to whether or not his work is art, argues convincingly that
###--###||Rev
Sidonius, trans. , Ad V. C. Catvllinvm:

'' this Kyoko Date, Webbie Tookay, , Virtual Idol, Diki
, folded where the legs join, looking and folded where the legs
-- Contributed by !
- by way of Jennifer's Bonner's Villon
Jennifer , my daughter Jennifer , my sister Jennifer Sond-
Women, you'd have Blattle Women. If God merged with , you'd have
Daishin Nikuko, Dr. Leopold Konninger, )
blue glow of dawn.' (James Lee Burke, Heaven's Prisoners)." (,
This is a perfect text by . It has everything in it: theory,
sort what needs unraveling. The perfect text by ends here.
Altavista postface to search for ""

re Carter, - this flicking among flics among flicks - an _o
(who knows nothing about this)
Ala[a-z]'[a-z]book[a-z]includ[a
>> Nikuko we're battering ourselves once again in
>> as in : if A then B else C - in which A and B
>> please note the lack of punctuation in the initial
>> line as everything remains unconstituted. But
>> until all of our are speechless in our presence
>> worrying the subjunctive literally to death, another
>> or you could begin in an other space: \there:
>> or "doing something else"
>> as if there is something else to do
>> when we're waiting for your reply, Nikuko
>> "in this busy world"
>> else you're \checking out
>> , I'm going to say this once and for all.
>> , I can't read this, it's going too fast,
PRIVATE MSG: >> , this is just to you, you'll hardly be
PRIVATE MSG: >> , this is just for you, you, you, amazing
>> , I can't believe this, <-------- ---- -------->
>> emergent engine tunnel - the sound almost
>> ing as the rails split and merge, split and merge,
>> ack looped in patterns which emerge inchoate,
>> lssubmerged emerges back again not coherent but
>> cproduction of the universe as if the end could
>> thtalled or a membrane torn and shriveled then
>> andsgain holding loop against loop, creating
>> fornc herself or himself, located the subject,
>> thie ee aindsm after
>> oihe sound one might imagine as transcendent,
>> that ot tterroducing internals
>> f'nnpxternal
>> iclattering against clattering as the same processing
>> ng else, something almost monstrous,
>> but und or appearance of a cavern or hollow mind
>> the s what will remain after universal chaos
>> eethid inchoate from all systems
>> reeeing from all systems
>> from as somsohich inderefled within the presence
>> frnihilation
>> tota
>> w an
>> el
>> Come and Join us One and All
>> My First Love's Name was Margaret Hall
>> A Schoolboy Crush, She Never Led
>> Me On and Now she Might be Dead
>> Beware the Schoolboy Crush, and Girl
>> You Never Know Life's Horrid Whirl
>> It takes you Here, It takes you There
>> And we Will Learn, Life is Unfair
>> Life will Die, and Stuff upon It
>> Misery will always Come
>> Perhaps that's Margaret's Rule of Thumb:
>> It's always Part of Someone's Hand
>> What Grasps the Tools that Make this Land
>> But Crushes Now go Nowhere Fast
>> Cause Earth Will End in Fiery Blast.
>><< >> Pet Pat! Put pit pot! >> Pin pan, pun. 'Pon
pen. >> Paw pew, pow! >> Pad pod.
>> Pop pap? Pip pep-pup. >> Pet Pat! Put pit pot!
>> Pin pan, pun. 'Pon pen. >> Paw pew, pow!
>> Pad pod. >> Pop pap? Pip pep-pup. >>
Pet Pat! Put pit pot! >> Pin pan, pun. 'Pon pen.
>> Paw pew, pow! >> Pad pod. >> Pop pap?
>> You can't preserve much; I have a volume >>
In New York there must be a dozen >> This is probably the
most international >> I write from an abstract or virtual
>> New York, like Newfoundland, has absolutely incredible
>> Some places, like Miami, conjure up >>
>> Pet Pat! Put pit pot! >> Pin pan, pun. 'Pon pen.
>> Paw pew, pow! >> Pad pod. >> Pop
read it if you may be offended by such. Kim Mcglynn, ]
Pardon me for interrupting, but are you the on the Poetics
>> ok here's a stupid joke. what did one pickle
>> you've got me in a pickle.
>> ok, here's a stupid joke. what did one spark
>> that was electrifying.
>> ok here's a stupid joke. what did one pencil
>> you've got me in the pen.
>> ok, here's a stupid joke. what did one window
>> i bet you think that was really clear.
>> ok, here's a stupid joke. what did one plate say
>> hold me before i spill the beans.
>> ok, here's a stupid joke. what did one cup say
>> hold me before i spill another bunch of stupid
stupid sucks idiot moron asshole
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the picture... Audio of these poems by Poetry Index,
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>> b >> i >> g >> s
>> e >> c >> r >> e
>> t >> i >> a >> m
>> n >> i >> k >> u
>> k >> o >> h >> e
>> e >> h >> e >> e
"The Voyage, by ." "I live around here." "Coral Gables is on

"rant" so be it. You're too good for us, , you're a piece of
You always ask too many questions. You are never content. ,
you are never content. , you are about to cross the "plane."
The "plane" is very broad and wide. With his fingers, , is
I exclude " Myouka ". I exclude " Jennifer ".
I exclude " Jenn ". I take my temperature.
Let there be no doubt. "".
>> this is the proof. i go to england...
>> and talk to myself.
>> no one is here to disturb me. a connection
>> moves across space through time in order
>> to bring me to myself. paths are taken, then
>> broken. packets are signed, delivered, according
>> of address and in the future, urgency. there
>> about myself returning to myself, nothing imminent
>> about this capturing process. i would have assumed
>> myself, no matter what the discourse emanating
>> from my body. now, however, i await my reply,
>> the connection holds. what is a proof without
>> what is a witness manque, through language, the thin
>> bandwidth all that is necessary
>> for my proof. here and there, a shattered mirror.
>> i am among us or myself. i can't carry this with
>> the machine. the machine.
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: "Recording this session" "Listening to this session"
: I remember when I used to write into the void,
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[ stopped recording]
Anderson (violin), (mandolin, guitar)
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